So I am dating someone. But this is not the first time I've debated introducing the talk about the hair style I am currently rocking is not real. Usually in relationships, friendships, etc people like to reveal little by little about themselves either verbally or physically, but when does the time come to be like: "you see this piece/fall/weave/wig/clip-ins/extensions - it's...uh...actually not mine...". A bigger internal question is whether there should be a time that you have to mention or say anything at all about your real/fake hair Should the talk come up when your wig flies off on a roller coaster? or maybe it should come up when the synthetic hair catches fire over a candlelight dinner? or is it more appropriate to bring it up when you are getting intimate and his hand gets caught in all that mesh and track?
I don't think think there is ever a good time to mention it and maybe it doesn't matter to some because some guys just assume and go along with all the pains that come along with it (keeping an umbrella in the trunk and a satin pillow at his house).
Usually when you take those moments to be like, "I have something to tell you...," guys are expecting 'oh she got 5 kids at home' or 'she is really a he'. To begin, I usually don't date guys who are hair obsessed to begin with, if I find their eyes deviating from my conversation floating up to my hair line trying to figure out what type of kinky-curl is that, I immediately become disinterested. I have definitely had guys tell me some pretty offensive stuff too no matter what my hair looks like at the moment:
A-hole 1: When my hair grows out, it looks like soft cork screw curls...its not like yours (this is a real conversation that took place)
Me: yours? please tell me what that is
A-hole 2: I have a question...is that your real hair?
Me: No, it's a wig (nonchalant)
A-hole 2: Can you take it off, I want to see your real hair (in the middle of the Casino)
A-hole 3: I love your hair, reminds me of my mother's hair - she's half latino, half black. I am glad she didn't get the nappy side of the family!
Me: I actually identify with the nappy side, sorry
Although I have never chemically straightened my hair, I still like to rock a variety of styles (curly to straight) including weaves, crochet braids, wigs, clip-in extensions, press n'curl, faux pieces (and in one month I'm getting box braids!).
I've come to the conclusion that there never really is a need to or does there need to be a time to talk to your significant other about what you do with your hair - its seems so frivolous! I come from the feminist-all-girls-school-education ideology, I DO WHAT I WANT, WHEN I WANT! but at the same time I feel like I should be more sensitive to the opposite sex when a question mark pops up over their head when you extension laden hair is taken down the next day and your hair is three inches shorter.
If he asks, I'll tell; if he doesn't, I'll probably tell him in some special circumstance like sorry I am going to be late, I'm drying my tracks (I happen to be candid like that). In the end he should appreciate you for you, not what is sewn, clipped, or pinned on your head - just make sure you know you look cute in it!